*VWOOP VWOOP VWOOP* Sound the Overdialoguing Alarm, folks! Yeahp, no question that Spooky’s recounting of the Capeys incident needed to be broken up over at least two pages, not stuffed into a single one.
Panel 2: Lordy loo, six g-d word balloons in a single panel. Ouch! Still, I quite like the interruption between balloons 2 and 3, nicely conveying that someone as hyperfocused on social status as Spooky is recounting an incident that she’d find skin-scrawling, if not downright nightmarish.
Panels
4 and 5 are obvsly overdialogued, sure, but also suffer from relying on
close-up shots; pulling the camera back to show Emp in, say, more of a
medium shot would’ve allowed for a better depiction of body language.
Or, maybe, show Emp more from a distance in panel 4, then zoom in for
the existing panel 5.
-Adam Warren